In a rut

Guys, I’m in a rut. A lazy, boring, dangerous rut.

On Monday, instead of going grocery shopping, I got take-out. By myself. Last night I threw leftover carnitas into fried rice and called it dinner (verdict: surprisingly tasty). My stock-pile of frozen leftovers is gone. I will in all likelihood have eggs and toast for dinner tonight AND tomorrow, since there’s pretty much nothing else edible in my fridge and I can’t be bothered to go shopping. I ate half a chocolate biscuit cake last night… and the other half the night before… and I’m really really sad that I’m out of halves. I got addicted to vegan cookies and now, embarrassingly, to Elfin Crackers from the vending machine. I’ve contemplated having ZoeYogurt for dinner more times than I can count.

And it doesn’t stop there.

I can’t tell you the last time I went to the gym (although I do know it was TWO colds ago). My excuses this week are 1) I got a tetanus shot, 2) I have a big concert next week, and 3) I’m in a rut.

I’ve watched 94 episodes of McLeod’s Daughters in about a month.

The same pile of clean laundry has been on my bed since Aussie put it there on Monday morning before he left.

At least I took out the trash, right?

Before you tell me to harden the fuck up, I know myself. Clothes on my bed? Not me. Eating out of a vending machine? Totally not me (not the “after” me, anyway). Marathon watching TV shows and skipping the gym? Ok… totally me. But not having enough food in the house to make sure I’m eating enough veggies is a red flag, people!

I miss Aussie. I’m tired of all the crap that goes along with his absence (airports, solo meals, dashed hopes about much-researched and much-anticipated birthday weekends…etc). I’m irritated with the stupid Seattle weather (although I do thank the universe for throwing us a bone today — it’s pretty nice and almost warm). I’m just… well… I’m just in a rut.

That’s all. Sometimes you just need to vent.


2 thoughts on “In a rut

  1. Jen says:

    Ugh, know the feeling… Can you go do something nice/fun for yourself, even if it’s only an hour or so?

    • Jenni says:

      That’s a good idea… maybe I’ll treat myself to a mani/pedi after work. That always cheers me up. 🙂 Thanks!

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