Naggy bitch of a gull

For two days in a row, as I’ve trotted across campus in the unseasonably cold weather to get my ambient-temperature-inappropriate iced americano, I’ve been treated to quite a treat. Two gulls, one male and one female, have taken up residence outside the HUB. They are never more than 5 feet away from each other, and the she-gull’s behavior has been cracking up!

She squawks constantly! She doesn’t shut up. At what?  The male, of course! Her beak is always aimed at him, and he just keeps walking away. Occasionally she rushes and gives him a poke, or a bite, or whatever it is female gulls do to express their displeasure… and he just ambles away, carelessly as you please. What a nag!… and what a jerk!

It leaves me wondering — what the hell did that male gull do to piss her off so much that she squawks at him without stopping for two days?  Did he check out another drab gray female gull? Did he forget to bring home some little grub or nasty piece of trash for their baby gulls to nibble? Did he plop his butt in front of their TV watching Discovery Channel and surfing internet forums (ha ha, just kidding babe!)?  And why doesn’t he care that she’s so unhappy???

Maybe I’m just anthropomorphizing the gulls, but regardless, how awesome is it that familiar human behavior can be observed in animals, even ones so seemingly non-human as garbage-eating gulls?  Ladies, let’s all take comfort in knowing that even female gulls can be naggy bitches!


5 thoughts on “Naggy bitch of a gull

  1. Jenni says:

    Side note: As a general PSA, I want to let y’all know that there’s no such thing as a “seagull.” That’s just an informal term for many species (and even more than one genus!) of gulls. Thank you, Wimbo, for this fascinating fact in my Diversity of Life class at UPS!

  2. Matt says:

    Sweet. Now I know all I need for some peace and quiet is a bag of hot fish and chips……..


    • Jenni says:


      And I can just jump in an M3 and drive as fast as you can run right ahead of you. You can chase and chase and chase and I’ll just LAUGH!! Maybe no peace and quiet, but some nice payback.

      Mwa. Ha. Ha.

      • Matt says:

        What you think I’d confuse a nice black M3 key fob for a fat, hot delicious greasy chip?

        I know the shape could be similar but come now….I don’t think I could throw chips that fast to get confused enough for that to happen!.


    • Jenni says:

      As a reply to your comment after this one:

      No… I’m likely to become a famous animal behaviorist due to my extraordinary observational skills, so I’ll buy myself an M3 to torture you. So there.


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